Nuke it from orbit, it’s the only way to be sure

Parents are crazy. When I was a child, few parents spent hundreds of dollars and hours on the rode driving their children to and from “events.” Soccer, hockey, dance, voice, gymnastics, cheerleading … the list goes on and on.

Oh, people took some lessons. My best friends were all in ballet. Once a year they had a recital, and they all got on their pink tights, did their hair, and away they went.

There were no expensive costumes, hair and makeup appointments before hand, professional photographers to memorialize your precious all dressed-up.

It was a simpler time. A cheaper time.

Now, people don’t play soccer. They’re on travel teams. They don’t cheer on the sidelines of football games, they are in all star cheer teams that compete at overblown events complete with bling for sale and huge trophies.

You’ve got to play the game to some extent – because otherwise your child simply won’t be able to compete even on the high school sport’s teams.

The ranks of varsity soccer are culled from the travel soccer teams. The cheerleaders need to have a few years of competitive cheer under their belt, or they simply won’t make the team. Basketball is probably one of the few egalitarian sports left.

Why do we do it? What has pushed us to this level?

Then there is Hollywood. They take the kid dealo to a whole new level.

I don’t really know what to say. I just watched a bit from last night, where the daughter of a wealthy and famous Hollywood star performed some sort of waving her hair back and forth song. Meh.

Has Hollywood become so self-referential that we’re going to be ever-increasingly bombarded by the children of the rich and famous for our “entertainment.” It’s the rich and famous version of the annoying stage mom, except instead of just being pushy and overbearing on the sidelines or audience of the soccer match/talent show/school play, these folks simply buy their children records, then use their power to put them on the stage of televised events. They don’t have travel teams. They have executive producer power.

Perhaps Hollywood could become a completely closed society. To become an actor, you’ll need to have a relative in the business- that’s been going on for years, but I’ve got this horrible feeling it’s going to get worse.

If your darling has absolutely NO talent, they can always throw them on some reality show.

Of course, “we” do have power. We can deprive them of oxygen. Refuse to buy/watch the crap they throw at us.

Or nuke it from orbit.

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2 Comments on “Nuke it from orbit, it’s the only way to be sure”

  1. Svenster Says:

    I like the sentiment but it may not be the solution to the uber-kid problem. Americans have been living vicariously through their children for a long time. Within bounds it’s life-affirming; carried to extremes it screws up the lives of parent and child. Maybe we are nearing the high point of the child-worship cycle and a little more balance will be forthcoming. At least we don’t live in a culture that encourages us to strap the latest in suicide vests on our children–couldn’t resist a shot at the religion of peace.

  2. Car in Says:

    Actually, my feelings on the uber-child issue go much deeper than I expressed in this post. But I was trying to stay focused.

    And while it’s good that we value our children more than those who dream of their child’s martyrdom, I don’t think we’re doing any favors to them by treating them as if the sun revolved around ’em.

    I could go on and on, because I just was involved in this over the past weekend.


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